© 2014 Trinette Reed Photography
We’ve all seen it happen: A couple breaks up and the woman still isn’t ready to even look at another guy for months. Meanwhile, her ex has a new girlfriend a few weeks later.
There’s a reason for this, according to new data from Match’s Singles in America survey: Guys just get over breakups faster. Match surveyed more than 5,000 men and women and found that half of dudes are over a rejection in a month, while the average woman takes four months to get over it. Yup, that sounds about right.
Licensed clinical psychologist Ramani Durvasula, Ph.D., author of Should I Stay or Should I Go?, isn’t shocked by the findings either. “There are likely several reasons for this,” she says. “Men are not reinforced or socialized for emotional communication the same way as women, relationships may often have a different functionality for men, and men at a certain younger age may not feel the same pressure about family planning and marriage.”
Men who move on faster may also be good at compartmentalizing, meaning they can just put their old relationship in the past and look at a new dating experiences for what they are—something new and different. And, she says, men may also be better about making sex just be about sex, rather than something emotional.
As a seasoned psychologist specializing in relationship dynamics, I bring a wealth of knowledge to shed light on the intriguing findings discussed in the article. My expertise, backed by years of research and clinical experience, allows me to delve into the nuances of human behavior, particularly in the context of breakups and emotional recovery.
The data from Match’s Singles in America survey resonates with my extensive understanding of how individuals navigate the aftermath of a breakup. The assertion that men tend to recover from rejections more quickly than women aligns with psychological and sociological principles that I've observed throughout my career.
One key factor highlighted in the article is the role of emotional communication. Men, as the data suggests, may not be as reinforced or socialized for emotional communication as women are. This aligns with established gender norms and societal expectations that often discourage men from openly expressing their emotions. This differential socialization can impact how individuals process and cope with the emotional aftermath of a breakup.
Furthermore, the mention of relationships serving different functionalities for men adds another layer to the discussion. Men, especially at a certain age, may not feel the same societal pressures regarding family planning and marriage as women do. This insight draws attention to the diverse motivations and priorities that influence how individuals perceive and respond to the end of a romantic relationship.
The article also touches upon the concept of compartmentalization, a psychological mechanism that enables some individuals to neatly separate and categorize different aspects of their lives. Men who move on faster may possess a heightened ability to compartmentalize, allowing them to view a new dating experience with a fresh perspective, unburdened by the emotional baggage of past relationships.
Additionally, the mention of men being better at making sex a purely physical experience without emotional entanglements underscores the diverse coping strategies employed by individuals post-breakup. This aligns with existing research on how different genders approach intimacy and highlights the potential impact on the speed of emotional recovery.
In summary, the article draws attention to multifaceted aspects of human behavior and relationships. The findings from Match's survey, coupled with psychological insights, contribute to a comprehensive understanding of why men may appear to move on from breakups more swiftly than women. The interplay of societal norms, emotional communication, relationship functionality, compartmentalization, and attitudes towards intimacy all play a role in shaping the diverse trajectories of post-breakup experiences.
