How many Christmas presents is too many? Let's overthink this together. (2024)

christmas presents

Stock photo.

It's Friday. Let's delve into a first-world problem for a moment.

How many Christmas presents is too many? Four? 10? 20?

With the holidays in just a few short weeks, most of us are scrambling to get the shopping done - except for a few of you overachievers who've already finished. Weirdos.

But before the wallet comes out, as parents you've probably had a discussion with your kids about expectations. Specifically, Christmas morning expectations.

Now that my husband and I have three kids, and the oldest is 4, we're trying to figure out a system for gifts. Both of our families live in town and we'll be seeing them on Christmas Day, so the potential for gift overload is high.

I want to mitigate theavalanche of gifts likely heading our way, partly because I don't want to raise greedy, entitled children and partly because I don't want my house overflowing with toys.

Do my husband and I get each of our kids exactly the same number of gifts? Or just spend the same amount of money on each? Which presents come from Santa and which from us? How can we use gift-giving to teach them something?

I have some friends who give their kids three presents - because Jesus got three gifts from the wise men - and others who give according to a specific set of specifications. All of these sound like good ideas to me, but with a week to go until Thanksgiving it's time to get a game plan together that I can relay to our kids so we manage expectations for Christmas morning.

I know, I know. I'm overthinking this. My generation tends to make parenting more complicated than it probably needs to be.

When I was a kid, my parents didn't have specific rules about Christmas presents other than trying to keep things fair and equal - spending the same amount on my sister and me, and trying to keep the actual number of gifts roughly the same when we were younger. Some gifts were from Santa and some were from them. Christmas morning was always amazing.

But so many cool ideas are out there now. (Thanks, Pinterest). I polled some local moms to see if they had a system for gift-giving, and their responses are below. Share yours in the comments so we can all overanalyze this together.

Cindy G.: "We have a budget. Quality over quantity, especially as they get older. Could be one, could be several."

Cynthia G.: "We always told our son that although Santa brought the presents, we wrote Santa a check to pay for them. Consequently, he couldn't ask Santa for EVERYTHING as our budget was $XXX. Further, he had to submit his list to Santa in time for Santa to send us a bill. ...Additionally this helped him to understand why we supported Christmas charities, the Salvation Army Angel Tree, Operation Christmas Child. We explained that the parents of the children we were helping couldn't afford to write Santa a check, so we helped."

Sarah D.: "We typically decide on a set number of gifts each year...usually about 2-4 per child, and often have one "big" group gift. This year is the first year my oldest has asked for specific things. We told her to make a list and that we'd pick one thing from her list toget. I also try to encourage the joy of giving...we've been working on Christmas presents for each other and other people/groups for a couple of weeks now."

Rebekah H.: "Three gifts. Jesus got three, you get three. Also try to do one big and two little, and a 'want, a need and a read.'"

Crissy T. (and echoed by several others): "I saw this list on a blog and pinned it to one of my boards. We try to stick with this as a guide for gift buying at Christmas. There have been times we have done a bit more but in general we try not to over buy."

Erin C.: Santa brings three gifts just like Jesus received three gifts. It helps to tie the magic of Santa into the real meaning of Christmas for us."

Beth B.: "We do 4...something you want, something you need, something to wear, something to read. The want is from Santa. The rest from us."

Rebecca W.: "Our sons get three and give three - three hours of community service, three backpacks for the homeless, three hours of playing music at a nursing home, etc. Keeps the real meaning of Christmas alive."

Amber K.: "I'll probably get flack for this, but I love the shock and pure joy on my girls' faces when they see their Christmas gifts on Christmas morning...The girls get one 'together gift' and then they get several things from their lists and several not on their lists. Christmas is the one time of year we can say 'yes' to things they don't get throughout the year, and I don't see anything wrong with spoiling my girls for one day. They are appreciative, joyful and thankful."